House of Bones

I suppose it's been long enough of a break. Once again, I am just writing this for myself these days, but whatever.

House of Bones, a SciFi Channel (I refuse to call it Syfy) original movie, was something of a surprise to me. First off, it's not original in any way; second, it was fantastic. From the opening credits you get a sense that it is not going to take itself overly serious, but not make a complete mockery of itself like films such as the Scary Movie franchise. Instead, the credits proficiently establish why the movie is taking place. Well, to be fair, the credits happen after a scene generally taboo in the horror movie industry: killing off a child.

So, the plot of the film is that a crew from a Ghost Hunters-like team go to a house with a terrifying past and a record of locals disappearing when they enter the home or get too close. When I said the movie makes fun of itself, it's in the way they portray the team. Ghost Hunters is, as I'm sure you've all seen in some manner, another SciFi show where two dudes and their buddies, all with technological know-how, go to "haunted" locations and prove or disprove paranormal activity. House of Bones portrays the fictional counterparts as cynics whose belief in ghosts is practically nonexistent. From their arrival to the house they sum up rooms, finding creepy filming spots to interview a psychic and apply fog machines. It's ribbing Ghost Hunters all the way up to when stuff actually starts happening; after that it's typical horror movie fare.

What sets this film apart from the majority of the SciFi movies is that the sum of all its parts is something altogether great. I can't think back to more than one scene where I was not wholeheartedly enjoying the movie. The acting and reactions are believable, keeping you engrossed in the story. Only the obnoxious kids in the beginning seemed like amateurs with zero experience and/or talent...well, except maybe the boy who gets offed. As a whole, I worried about each character's fate, groaned when scenes were playing out that signaled potential death, and sighed in relief when I was wrong.

Special effects, too, were above the norm for a cable television release. The reason why was awesome: it went old school in delivery. Computer generated ghosts were absent, instead replaced by quality techniques to induce tension, be it through creepy ambiance or claustrophobia. Also, the filmmakers used physical props and so on instead of relying on their tech staff to create the antagonist and victims. As a rule, if the object of terror actually can be seen by the cast, their reactions are better. Look at Jurassic Park!

Without a doubt, this is one of SciFi's shining successes. If you don't catch it on television soon after reading this, go out and find a copy. Buy it, rent it, watch it online if you can, but make sure you experience House of Bones.